Japanese Style Introduction

Unfortunately, some Japanese have partially adopted the Western handshake and when they see your face they will automatically assume this is the proper way to approach you. However, you must discourage this handshaking action at every possible chance.

Bowing is the proper way of meeting Japanese people. There are many theories on how this bowing habit became the acceptable way of meeting one another in Japan. Some scholars propose that it originated from the Samurai warrior class. When two samurai met each other they bowed so that neither of them could pull out their swords. Well, it could well be.

Now, once the introduction is done, bowing and all, you must go right into asking about your partner’s health. To neglect this part of the introduction would definitely insult your fellow Japanese. Remember, this is another portion of Japanese style introduction that is very much symbolic. When I say symbolic, I mean it doesn’t have any substantial meaning. Why then?

Well, just keep in mind that any Japanese asking about your health doesn’t care in the least whether you are well or barely walking. It only means that you are graciously following due steps to a meaty part of your conversation.

Yes, a how-are-you in Japanese is like one of the buttons on your jacket – you need to button them up to your neck. While you are meaninglessly asking about the partner’s heath, be sure to add extra inquiries on his/her family’s wellbeing. That is essential in the sense that it shows how you are concerned not only with his/her health but kindly with his/her relations as well– which is a sort of gesture most valued in Japanese life.

Enough is enough on introductions.

Now, we come to another feature of Japanese life quite challenging for average foreigners to grasp: face–saving.

I’ve lived in the states over quarter of a century and believe I know how it is to “save face” in the United States. In fact, face-saving is no common ritual there. But it certainly is, here. How should I go about nailing this concept into your western mind?

Let me put it this way:

Probably the most important aspect of social and business contacts is the fact that, at all costs – mind you, at all costs – under any circumstances, you must try to “save your own face” as well as that of your friend, neighbor, associate, acquaintance, or any other person you may happen to come in contact with no matter whether he be above or below your social status.

How’ that?

I mean to emphasize how and what it is to “save face” in Japanese life. Let me say a few more words to really drill right into your mind the concept of “face saving”.

To act otherwise would be most disasterous for you as well as for the other fellow. In fact to make another person lose face, especially in public, only makes you a possible candidate for a cement footbath in the Sumida River or for a pointed instrument which will probably be quietly inserted at the base of your spine just between your kidneys.

Well, you know I’m overstating somewhat. But count one me, I’m telling you the gravity of the matter in the best way I know how.

In my next installment, I’ll elaborate on this subject. You see, what you are reading now is a piece of thesis on some essential segment of Japanese culture so difficult to get a “feel” of in common guidebooks, let alone square academic theses. So, be sure to “tune in” or rather peep into my page to see what I have to pass on to you on “things Japanese “.

Bye.

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  4. Further on Courtesy

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